Broken News

We interrupt this regularly scheduled program to bring you an important announcement. Sources within the state department have confirmed that U.S. authorities have just captured the infamous head of the notorious Sinaloa drug cartel, dealing a serious blow to the flow of illegal drugs into the United … excuse me? What’s that? He’s already been replaced!

Pardon us for the interruption folks. We now return you to your regularly scheduled program.

Practicing What’s Preached

Two people were removed from the Republican National Convention last night after they threw nuts at an African-American CNN camera operator and said, “This is how we feed animals.”

Multiple witnesses observed the exchange and RNC security and police immediately removed the two people from the Tampa Bay Times Forum.

Interestingly enough, it appears the two culprits did not have names, and, as some have speculated, they will probably be allowed to attend the remainder of the convention.

Nevertheless, I applaud the decision of RNC Security Police to remove the two malignant tumors from the event before their stupidity had a chance to metasticize and spread to other attendees. I suppose this is what inevitably happens when the political rhetoric of political candidates is tailored to appeal to the sordid ideologies of the consumately ignorant, who subsequently embrace the notion that their ideologies are suddenly valid.

They simply practice what is preached.

The convention released a statement saying, “Two attendees tonight exhibited deplorable behavior. Their conduct was inexcusable and unacceptable. This kind of behavior will not be tolerated.”

I sure hope they weren’t referring to the Security Police?

Two People Removed From RNC Convention After Taunting Black Camera Operator